


Without Pause

by authorallyy



Category: youtube - Fandom
Genre: Captain America - Freeform, I feel like this is plagiarism, Jack as Bucky, M/M, Mark as Steve, and the gays, for fun, more will be changed when Civil war is updated, stucky au, very few changes to the story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 02:55:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7416877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/authorallyy/pseuds/authorallyy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I choose you. And I’ll choose you, over, and over, and over, without pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat, I’ll keep choosing you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Without Pause

Lets start from the beginning.

It was 1943, World War Two was raging across the sea. America had been involved, and we came in need to our allies. Problem was, they needed soldiers. And I planned to do anything to get into the services and help.

Jacky, my best friend who I knew since I was little, was already in the service. Of course now I didn't see him often as I used to, Since he lived on base and was always in training. I made it my mission to get into it with him before he was deployed.

This meant forging documents, through false names and DOBs and cities I was born in. I was a different person every time, and every time I was declined.

Household contact with Tuberculosis. Chronic colds and sinusitis. Scarlet fever. Heart palpitations and family history of heart disease. Nervous trouble. Easy fatigability. My asthma alone kept me enlistable, and that I couldn’t fake.

I was a little guy with a lot of problems. Jacky admired my ability to never stop trying, but still asked of me to give it a rest. I’d get caught, then where would I be? I kept going though, and finally while he left me behind to take two girls dancing, I walked of to the nearest recruitment center and dived headfirst into something more than I bargained for. Jacky was ecstatic that I had gotten in. Just in time, too, with him being deployed to England the next morning to the 107th infantry. While he was deployed, I was sent into training where Dr. Erskine monitored myself and the other soldiers who were with me. My fate was sealed when a grenade was tossed in the center of us and I was the only one to shield the explosion from hurting anyone else, while the more physically able ran in fear. Thankfully, it was a dud and the Doc picked me for his experiment. I still remember his words, ‘Continue to be an imperfect soldier, and a good man.’ I was taken to a secret base through an antique shop in Brooklyn and there, I was changed.

My asthma, heart problems, all of it was gone and what replaced it was health, stamina, strength. The Doc and Mr Stark explained it as the super-serum, which changed my dna and beefed up just about everything I was made of. And what did it led up to? Selling war bonds.

I wasn’t on the front line, using what I gained to help win the war, I socked men dressed as Hitler across the states so more of the people would buy war bonds. Sure, more bonds sold means more bullets in the gun of your best soldier, but it didn't feel right. I felt like a circus monkey. 

I suppose it changed when I first got to speak to a battalion of soldiers. They’ve been through hell, and didn't fall for the ‘Captain America’ shtick one bit. I didn't blame them, really. After the show, I heard about the 107th, and how many casualties there were. What stuck with me wasn’t the number of casualties, but was what infantry was effected.

Against the Sergeant's orders, I left the encampment in search for the soldiers left behind. Even Agent Carter told me Jack was most likely dead but I refused to believe it. And even if he was, there were men left behind that I needed to save.

I had gotten in, stolen the keys to the cells and released the men before I had found Jack. Letting them go ahead and blast their way out of here, I had searched deeper in the facility, where I stumbled upon him.

He was strapped to a table, mumbling nonsense-- some in english, some in Irish. He had a blank look, and I feared the worst. Unstrapping him and meeting his eyes, he seemed to finally recognize what was happening.

“Mark..” He drawled,  I had stood him up, as he looked me up and down.

“I thought you were dead, Jacky.”

His eyes grew as he finally realized wha was in front of him. “I thought you were smaller..”

“C'mon, we gotta get you out of here.”

As we started to walk, he continued. “What happened to you?”

“I joined the Army.”

Vaguely knowing the way out, I led us down the hall.

“Did it hurt?”

“A little.”

“Is it permanent?”

I hesitated, looking back to him. “So far.”

As we made it through a heavy door, explosions boomed throughout the base. Whatever Hydra was working on, it malfunctioned. I led Jack up and up, to the next stairwell where we would be safer, only to be confronted by a man the Doc told me about, about how mad he was.

“Captain America! I’m a great fan of your films,” His german accent echoed in the cavernous metal room we all were in, as fires and explosions rioted below us. Jacky could barely stand, as I left him behind at the rail. Schmitt and I both walked forward on the metal walkway.”So, Dr. Erskine managed to perfect it, after all.”

Quieting him, I socked him square in the face, making him shrug to the side and hold onto the bars encasing us. As he stood he muttered something in german and went to punch back, only to me met with my shield. 

His knuckles left an indent the shape of his fist in the metal.

The walkway retreated on both sides, and he talked about being the Doc’s greatest accomplishment. Pulling at his skin he revealed it was just a mask, and was lied underneath was red and like a skull. 

He ran from his problems, meaning me. Meanwhile I shoved Jack in the right direction and we went higher, to a steel beam, our only way to the other side where a doorway lay. I let him go first, but before I could follow the beam screeched under the heat and fell to the fire below. 

“There.. There has to be a way--”

“Go! Go, get out of here!” I shouted, motioning him to go ahead.

“No, not without you,” He shouted back, gripping the railing.

Like Jacky always was, persistent.

Instead of arguing, I knew we didn't have the time. So I bent the railing back, gave myself a few feet to launch my self and..

The next morning I walked beside Jack and a thousand of men who were left behind, into the camp that originally left them. 

The camp has surrounded us as some wounded were taken for treatment. The Sarge wasn't happy with me, but was kind enough to let me off easy. I did bring back hundreds of men to our side of the lines.

“Hey, let’s hear it for Captain America!” Came Jack from behind me, who shouted to anyone in the huddle we made could hear. Shouts all around reverberated through the men, celebrating the feat I had made, as Jack patted my shoulder.

It was only months before I lost him again.

I had built a team, including Jacky, that aided me on missions to destroy Hydra bases. Schmitt’s Doctor, was on a one way trip to the main facility by train, and it was ur mission to get on board. We ziplined onto the train and snuck our way into the train. By the time we made it in, Jack and I were separated by compartment. We were trapped and attacked, and while I subdued my attacker easily, Jacky wasn’t so lucky.

I had unlocked the door, tossed him my pistol, and rammed into one of the large crates and eliminated the hiding spot where his attacker was. Once in the crosshairs, Jack took him down.

Not before the large padded man wielding two super guns who attacked me had returned and blew us both backwards, while also creating a gaping hole in the side of the train. I was blown to the side, and while Jack was still standing he took my shield and was shot out of the train compartment. Even though I climbed out to where he hung on the scrap metal, over a snowy, icy chasm, his rail broke, and he fell to the icy river separating the two mountains.

I knew I had to push on, for him. 

And I did. Killed Schmitt, helped win the war. In it that, I crashed into the ice and was frozen for seventy years.

I spent three years with SHIELD, fighting alongside others who I had grown friendly with. They weren’t just footsoldiers, but amazing people with amazing abilities. I didn't just fight for America, but I fought for the world, its safety, and everything it stood for. When aliens and gods attacked we stood tall and fought back. Now with the biggest world threat dismissed, I had some time on my hands.

I had a new group, while Tony and the rest were off relaxing after the events of New York. Natasha and I kept up on missions from SHIELD. Things were going as smooth as they could, I was adjusting to the new world, making friends, trying to figure out where I place nowadays.

Then,  _ he  _ attacked Director Fury.

Fury came to my apartment bloodied, showing me messages about how SHIELD had been compromised. Before we could really talk bullets rang through the windows and struck him where it counts. 

I was in pursuit before Kate could relay it back to HQ.

I had caught up, crashing through a window to be on  _ his  _ level, the building’s roof. Tossing my shield, Instead of hitting him square in the head he had turned and caught it. Even in the dark I saw his arm was metal, a star painted on the shoulder. He was wearing military grade armor, and most likely with a militaries amount of weapons hidden underneath. He masked all but his eyes, a shiny blue that was lined in smudged, black warpaint. What was most striking about him, was his neon green hair.

He threw it back and I caught it, only barely, as he force make me slide on my feet. He was then gone without a trace.

I watched on as Fury was operated on, hearing the doors open behind me. I knew who it was before looking back to her. Natasha was usually a thorn in my side, with her snide comments and constantly trying to hook me up with someone, but a good friend none-the-least. I trusted her for a multitude of reasons, and she trusted me. If SHIELD was compromised, I knew I could trust her.

“Is he going to be okay?” She stood beside me, looking on to the bloody man before us.

“I don't know,” I answered simply, quietly.

I felt her eyes dart to me, before returning to Fury. “Tell me about the shooter.”

“He was fast, strong. Had a metal arm, and was carrying enough to take out the cavalry. Vibrant green hair.”

Hill, an agent who Fury had called hours before, joined us, filling us in on the ballistics. Nat recognized them, soviet made.

Natasha and I, we were on our own. If SHIELD was compromised, we couldn't call for backup. We found out that this man, he had been alive for as long as I was encapsulated in ice. They had him on record as The Winter Soldier, with more calculated kills then the best snipers to date. 

After SHIELD tried to take us out with heat seeking rockets, we acquired Sam Wilson, otherwise known as Falcon. Now unlisted and retired, he was glad to join and help us. He helped get info on the algorithm devised by Hydra, which led us to our next mission, get into the hanger holding the heli-carriers. 

That was before the man with all the information was yanked out the window and was splattered on the pavement by a moving truck going seventy.

_ He  _ was back.

Flipping from our car as Sam put on the breaks, The Winter Soldier caught himself on the road by his metal arm, his fingers digging into the rock like sand. He looked up, his green hair batting lightly in the wind. His face was just about completely covered now, keeping me from his icy blue eyes. Someone behind us rammed into us, making our stopped car skid forward and right toward him. He jumped on top of the car, just before breaking a hole in the ceiling and pulling the steering wheel straight from its socket. We felt his weight leave the car, just before the suv behind us rammed us again and made the car twist. I held up my shield, pulled Natasha more securely into my lap, and grabbed Sam’s arm.

‘Hold on!” I shouted, just before we collided with the side of the highway and the car door gave away to our weight. We flew out, protected from shrapnel by my shield. Sam rolled once we collided with the opposite side of the highway, but was fine. I unwrapped myself from Nat, and she stood shakily. I stood, finding the green haired soldier easy in the sun. An armored man handed him a weapon, something I recognized as a grenade launcher, but with more dangerous rounds. Without hesitation the Winter Soldier raised the gun and shot it with pinpoint accuracy. I shoved Natasha out of the way and held my shield up as the rocket collided with my shield. I flew back, ricocheting off a abandoned car and falling to the street below the overpass. Crashing into the glass window of a greyhound bus, the driver swerved and turned on its side, blocking the street. From above, explosions continued. He must be targeting Nat next. As things quieted above I slowly sat up, the people of the bus fleeing like they should.

What sounded like someone landed on a car came from outside the bus, before gunfire was unleashed on the length. I stood and ran, barely dodging the blind bullets flying through the underside of the bus to me. Crashing through the back window I rolled and met my shield, waiting for me like obedient dog. Lifting it, I shielded myself from the onslaught of bullets. Using the curve of the shield I took out the few guys on the sides, as I approached the man with the gatling gun in the center. From above, Sam popped up and took out who he could. I took out the chaingun wielder and continued, Sam shouting down that he has it under control up there. 

I then went into a full on sprint. Down the road, I could see him, I watched as he casually rolled a ball under a car before it exploded, I watched Natasha attack and get subdued. His arm, momentarily stopped by a malfunction disc, rolled in its metallic socket and he was able to continue. He shot, and from behind where she hid Natasha let out a groan in pain. By the time he climbed a car for a better vantage point, I was on top of him. 

With a solid kick to my shield he fell on his back and I flew off the car where he had perched himself. He sat up and emptied the last in his gun into my shield, before rolling off the car before pulling his pistol out. A handful of other shots and we were into hand-to-hand combat, both of us too strong and smart with our moves to really land any punches. My shield did no good, he grabbed the edge and shoved me away. Taking the shield from me he pushed me away, where I rolled and faced him again. He threw the shield, imbedding it in the van behind me. 

Once it was out of his hands he pulled a knife from his side and flipped it between his fingers. I was on top of him again, grabbing his arm before he stabbed it through my chest. He was strong, his metal arm ten times stronger. We fought but it felt like an uphill battle. Finally, I got the upper hand and roundhouse kicked him into the van. He dropped his knife and created a dent in the metal, while I shot forward and kneed him hard in the stomach. Barely fazing him he continued the onslaught of punches, us both barely blocking each other from each other's blows. I pulled him from the van and down to the ground, where he only flipped around and took my throat in his metallic hand. Murder was in his icy eyes. Thick eyebrows furrowed down in anger as he squeezed,  before pulling me close and tossing me away.

Rolling over the hood of a car I landed on my back, just in time to see him come along with me to land on top of me. I rolled out of the way, letting his fist break the concrete where my head just was.I took his punches with my raw side, feeling the effects of a unstoppable metal arm. He pulled a second knife from his belt and aimed to kill. With both hands I stopped him, only long enough to dodge the knife that jabbed past my head and into the metal of the van behind me. We slid, creating a jagged slash in the metal. I slipped behind him and flipped him over my head, giving me the half second to pull my shield from the van.

I countered his attacks almost easily now, flipping him around and using my shield to drive into the metal plates making up his arm. It stopped him but didn't break him, which led him to flip around again. Still having a hand on his arm I yanked his behind me and over my head, flipping him over me and into the ground.

He left the mask in his roll, before standing again. Turning towards me, I froze. 

I’d recognize him anywhere. His photo from the forties was still in the Captian America exhibit at the Smithsonian, but then, he had short brown hair and soft eyes. He had grown a bit more than just a five-o'clock shadow, a short fuzz blotching the face I remembered so well.

“Jacky?” I questioned exasperatedly, in confusion and wonder.

His Irish accent rang through the silent street we stood. “ _ Who the hell is Jacky? _ ”

I barely noticed as he raised his pistol at me, finger on the trigger, ready to kill me so simply before Sam flew from nowhere. With both feet,  he knocked Jack out of the way before he could pull the trigger. 

I was frozen. Jack died years ago, how the hell was he still here? Why was he like this?

From behind me, a rocket whizzed past my head and landed in the car beside where Jacky landed. Natasha, barely standing but still able to pull the trigger on Jack’s dropped weapon. Looking back as the smoke cleared, and he was gone.

SHIELD then appeared in his wake. People I once trusted surrounded the three of us, guns drawn and giving us orders. I could barely think, so I complied. My two allies did the same.

“It was him.” I said, mostly to myself, as we were on our way back to SHIELD with indestructible cuffs on our wrists. The two sat across from me as I spoke for the first time since we were loaded into this car. “He looked right at me, and he didn’t even know me..”

Jacky was something special to me. I grew up with him, he had seen me at my worst, saved me from bullies countess times, crawled into my sleeping bag to keep me warm on the nights I thought it was a smart idea to camp out on our building’s roof, he kept me grounded, kept me out of trouble most times. When I couldn't keep my mouth shut he was there to reassure that I didn't need my face smashed in and they didn't need to bully anymore. He was there when my Mom died, trying to give me a place to stay because it  _ pained  _ him to see me go through it alone. He was more than just my best friend, I loved him, in more ways than one. All the history we shared, how can that all be forgotten?

To think that it did, hurt. More than any bullet or broken bone. It wasn’t something that could be dulled with a shot of Penicillin, and it made my chest feel almost... Hollow. The only other time I felt this empty was when I lost him that night on the train.

“How is that even possible, that was like seventy years ago.” Sam replied, watching me, worriedly.

“Zemo. Jack must have been captured in 43’ and Zemo experimented on him.” I kept my eyes drawn down. “Whatever he did must have helped him survive the fall-”

“None of that is your fault, Mark.” Nat intercepted, leaning her head back on the metal inside of the van. Her voice was monotone, she was hiding her pain.

“Even when I had nothing, I had Jacky. I can't help feeling responsible, I left him behind.”

With  the aid of Agent Hill, we escaped Hydra and was taken to an underground location where we found that Fury was alive. I had to clear my mind of Jacky and it felt damn-near impossible. Fury put me in charge, seeing as how the small group of trustworthy people leaned towards my reasoning. We needed to get into those helicarriers and change their routing through data chips, and I wasn’t going to do it unless SHIELD and Hydra both disappear. With what's left of SHIELD agreeing, we went on our way.

Things were going off smoothly, as smoothly as it could. I was in, I had gotten past the Hydra attack team and had changed chips in the first carrier. Sam, was able to get another switched, leaving the third and final carrier left. We both made it to the third carrier, when Jack reappeared.

He tackled me from the side, throwing me over the side. Sam, wings opening to fly down and catch me, was held back by Jack before he was thrown off too, one wing torn off. I watched him,  from where I held on, freefall till he was able to unhook his parachute. I was able to stand, as Sam relayed that without his wings, he was out of the game. 

“It’s fine, I got it,” I replied, going forward and into the carrier from the lower level I was at. I got into the walkways to the central area where the chips were, but instead, I found Jacky.

“People are gonna die, Jack,” I spoke, hoping to God my words mean something to him. “ I can't let that happen. Please.. Please don't make me do this.”

His look was blank, killer. It was as if he couldn’t hear me. I heaved a mental sigh. I really, really didn't want to kill him. And if I could manage, I wouldn’t.

I refused to let him slip out of my fingers again.

I threw my shield, and he deflected it, making it ricochet back to my arm. I used it to shield myself from his bullets as I stepped closer, before shoving him with my shield. He turned, only to return to me gun drawn again. He shot twice into my side, and in my pain and swung my shield like a punch and launched him backward. As he approached again he drew a thick hunting knife and came at me. He was stronger than he was last time, more brutal. He was a machine, just following orders now. It was almost as if there was so symbalance of man left in him. 

In our hand-to-hand combat I shoved him behind me, letting me rush forward and bring the chips down to the level we were at. He came at me again with the knife as the chips moved down to position. I was able to deflect his knife attack with my shield, the only thing I have that is close enough to his metal arm. Twisting him around I kicked him square in the stomach and he flew back.

I went to change the chips but he was on top of me again. He seemed ruthless, and it was frightening me. I wanted Jack back, not this mindless killing machine. If this is what they made him, is there any way to get him back?

We fought our way around the ground walkway surrounding the chips. I used my shield as my primary weapon, knowing my fists hand little effect on him. Soon he grew tired of it and with a war cry he tackled me off the side of the railing. The chip fell from my hand and I could tell he knew that was the key to stopping what I was going to do. It slid off the side of the small surface of metal we fell on and I flipped him to follow. I then jumped to join him, bolting after the chip as I landed on the glass surface encompassing us. He had my shield, and hit me with it before I could get the chip. I grabbed the shield and hid behind it as he returned to his pistol. In the moment he changed clips I tossed it back and knocked the gun from his metal fingers. He was unstoppable. 

Pulling a second knife again from his side he came in close and aimed to kill. I blocked and blocked, both hands on his hand but without my shield, his strength surpassed mine and the blade sunk itself into my shoulder. He threw me to the side and I yanked it out, before launching myself at him as he got the chip in hand. Lifting him by his neck, I flipped him over my back and held him in a standing armbar.

“drop it!” I said, out of breath. In a last ditch effort he slammed his fist that held the chip against my hand but I didn’t budge. “I drop it!”

When he continued fighting I pulled his arm back enough to hear a sickening crunch. He let out a yell in pain as I Let go of his arm, before I wrapped my arm around his neck. He reached up with his metal arm, pulling my free hand from his head, only to be trapped by my leg. He was trapped, and I waited for him to go slump in my arms. The clip clamoured to the glass.

Hopefully, he would be out long enough to get him to safety.

I took the chip and made my way up the glass exterior, making it to the metal platform we fell from before a shot sliced through my other shoulder.

Not long enough.

Jack was up and going,and I had no time to lose. I jumped and started to climb, only to be shot again. I grunted through it, Making it to the platform I needed to be on. 

“30 seconds, Cap.” rang Hill in my ear, as i fumbled to stand and set the chip in place. But before I could, another shot hit me, this time in the center of my back.

I fell to my knees and fell against the chip caddy in pain. Blood quickly soaked my abdomen, as I struggled to stand.  _ 30 seconds. Now, less. _ Using the caddy for support I finally smashed the chip in place, relaying to Hill that it was ready.

“Mark, get out of there.”

I slumped again, my face contorting in pain I felt the ship change altitudes. “Fire now,” I mumbled, hoping Hill heard me.

“But Mark-”

“Just do it!” I shouted at her, pain encompassing me. “Do it now.”

The other end was silent for a long moment, before the carrier rumbled, explosions going off in the distance. I stood, just enough to grip the railing for support as the carrier tilted dangerously. That's when I saw him, Jacky was pinned under a thick steel beam that had collapsed with the first explosion. I could barely move, but I powered through it. I tossed the pain to the back of my mind and climbed my way back to Jacky. The carrier began to crash, reverberations knocking me off my feet. I kneeled, my arms reaching around the beam as I struggled to lift it, to free him. I heard him groan in pain, his metal arm clanging against the beam. I lifted it an inch more and he wiggled free, before lifting himself on his elbows.

I let the beam fall back down as I used it for support as I watched him. “You know me,” I said, my voice gruff and full of pain. I watched him struggle to stand, before his metal fist swung around and  landed square on my shield, as I was able to lift it enough to block. 

“No, I don’t!” He yelled, anger rampant in his voice. 

I stood again, as he did too. “Jacky.. You knew me your whole life..”

In reply he swung his arm and backhanded me, making me loose my feet and fall backwards. I used the beam to stand again.

“Your name is Jack William McLoughlin--”

“Shut up!” He screamed, tossing another fist at me. We were both weak, we both fell with each attack. 

We then both stood slowly. “I’m not going to fight you,” I said, letting the shield fall from my arm and through a gaping break in the glass. “You’re my friend..”

He stared at me for a short moment before running forward and tackling me, making me fall flat on my back. He sat on top of me then, fist at the ready. “You’re my mission,” he said, before landing punch after punch. 

My cheek had already cut open, the wound swelling quickly. There was a pause in his attack.

“Then finish it..” I said weakly, my eyes going blurry. He still held his fist up, ready to attack. “ _ Because I'm with you till the end of the line.. _ ”

He had said that to me, the day I lost my Mom. Offered to let me stay at his place, and after I declined he finally gave in, not before reassuring me that he would always be there.  _ Till the end of the line. _

I couldn't see his arm slowly lower, another boom trembling through the carrier. I felt a shove, and I was free-falling with large shrapnel falling beside me. I hit the water with a painful splash, making my vision begin to fade. Bubbles floated up around me in dizzying spirals, fire raged on the surface, a figure dived in after me, green hair still vibrant as the world went black.

I woke up in a hospital room, unrecognizable Jazz bringing me into the world of the living. It took me a long moment to find my surroundings, the phone, the tray of uneaten hospital food, the number of cords coming from my arms, and Sam who was beside me. My voice was gruff, unused, but I came out clear enough to make a smile pull from Sam’s lips.

“On your left.”

It took months to fully recover. Scars now marked my body, but that didn't bother me much. Shield was no more, and Fury was, as far was the DA was concerned, dead. Nat had no covers left, and we had no jobs. But it was better this way. While Natasha cleared a few things I had asked her to get a certain file for me, and she delivered. 

Jacks.

“So you're going after him?” Sam sounded from behind me, reading over my shoulder as Nat walked away. 

‘You don't have to come with me.” I replied, eyes boring into the faded black and white photo of Jack, with a clean face and short, cropped hair. I definitely would go after him. I'd go to all ends of the earth to bring him back to me, the real Jacky. I'd do anything to pull him from the clutches of Hydra and all they had done to him, I wanted to protect him. Protect him like he protected me for years.

“I know.” There was a pause, before I felt his eyes on me. “When do we start?”


End file.
